coming to terms...

I think I'm coming to terms with IVF. I was feeling so awful and resistant about it last week, but I'm calming down now. I'm not feeling desperate right now, but if IVF will give me what I want, I will do it. Do I really want to go through another year childless with no end in sight? No, I want this to be over with.

I am ready. I was ready in October, and I'm ready now. I can do this, especially thinking of things one day at a time. The next couple of days I need to take my BCP's. Focus on one step at a time and deep breathing.

I will meet with Dr. T on Wed. I hope I can get some reassurance.

We did get our official approval for shared risk! So that's great. Shared risk means that we pay one price for a max of 3 fresh cycles and unlimited frozen cycles (meaning if you get more than 2-3 good embryos on a fresh cycle, they freeze the leftovers to be thawed and transferred another time).

Anyway, I'm glad I'm feeling better about it all. I was definitely stressed about it, but I can do this. It is going to be fine, and at the end there will be a baby or at least closure.